Dear Son…

Me and Son

(Honestly, if I’d known I was going to take a photo of us at lunch yesterday and then put it on the internet for all of posterity I would have put on a bit of makeup! Oh well. There’s something quite fitting in the fact that I didn’t, considering how little make-up I’ve worn over the years.)

So how are you today? You know there’s a lot of people who’ll read this thinking I’m writing an open letter to one of my boys. People, this is Sonya. She’s been my best friend since we were twelve. It’s about time you met her. She’s wonderful.

Anyway, I’ve been thinking about what we were talking about, about my blog, and I AM sorry I haven’t been blogging more. It’s a tricky balance, really, between blogging and novel-writing. And Facebook…and now everything seems to be pointing to me getting a bit more active on Twitter to promote my writing a bit more. LIKE I HAVE THE TIME! I will. Eventually. We’ll see.

But I do need to be more consistent again with blogging. I do so enjoy it. I think twice a week will have to be my limit though, because last year so little other writing got done. So I will commit to blogging on Monday mornings, and Thursday mornings. Is today Thursday? It is? Oh good. And if I get a fabulous new idea, instead of breaking schedule I’ll save it up in the queue and blog it next time. And yes, you can hold me accountable to that. You can call me up and yell at me if there isn’t a blog on your inbox on those mornings.

It’s a funny old world, the blogging one. Everybody has different limits, personally, on how much to share with the world at large, and what’s public information vs what’s private information. What IS “too much information”? I think the answer to that changes from culture to culture, and time period to time period too. And there’s the weirdness of finding out what your closest friend is thinking from reading their blog. And I’m sorry about that. Although it may help to know that sometimes that’s how Tony knows what’s going on in my head too – and he’s my husband! I’m beginning to think I’m a product of my generation, I blog to “be”. But if I were an artist in 19th Century Paris, say, I’d probably hang out in cafes and make sweeping political statements, to “be”.

Does that make sense to you? Nah, I thought not 🙂

But I like this idea of writing to friends. If I don’t know what to say, I’ll pick someone I know reads my blog (yes I am thinking of you Theresa!) and write it to them. It helps me think. And it feels nice. And maybe, with a bit of thought and practice, I can grow this idea into something bigger.

Thanks for being my friend. Thank you, more than I can say, for your loyalty, and for putting up with me/sticking by me through all my ups and downs and wild ideas and craziness. And stupid clothes choices. You are the best. I’m glad everyone on the internet can know that about you now, too.

Love you, always.

Megan xox

Dear readers, teach your children this: to love their friends, especially when they are young. Be kind. Be loyal. Don’t forget the ones who support you. They are the ones you’ll find in your adulthood, the ones who you pick up with as if it’s only been a week since you saw each other last, not a year or two, and who’ll feel like family. Don’t burn those old bridges, because they are the roads back into your deepest heart, your childhood dreams, your sunniest memories.

And, dear readers, if you have a friend from your early childhood, fond memories (maybe of frogs, cows, and early morning rides to school in a police car…thinking of you, Simmone), come on. This is the days of Facebook and Twitter. Find them. Say hi. You never know how happy they may be to see your name again, or what joy may come.

Go on, do it. I dare you!

 

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Details schmetails…do it anyway.

For those who have been following my blog regularly you’ll know that we’ve just bought a new car, I’m about to go overseas for the first time, I’m stepping into crazy new territory on a personal level, and, just to cap it all off, we’re in the middle of a real estate/building “property development” (SMALL scale) thingo.

I’m a mother. And a writer. I have a small and fairly uneventful part-time job. What the hell am I doing with all this STUFF???? Since when did I need a lawyer and an architect and a contact person at the council? Since when did I count my budget in the thousands, not the tens? Since when did I have more US Dollars in my savings account than Australian ones? (Well that last one is easy – that would be since Wednesday, because the exchange rate is so good right now).

Since when have I been the woman who throws out old clothes and buys new ones, instead of just “making do”? Since when?

Since, I guess, since I started saying “Yes” to radical things, in faith, that were really a bit beyond my understanding. Since I believed. (If you want more details about my “saying yes”, go read this post here.

I don’t know what I’m doing right now. I’m probably making ONE KAZILLION AND ONE mistakes. And then some. I think I’m annoying some people. It doesn’t matter.

Here’s one thing I know: I’m not a details person. I never have been. I’m an arty-farty head-in-the-clouds creative daydreamer.

Here’s another thing I know: It Doesn’t Matter. Yes, there are people who would be much, MUCH better and more qualified than me to do all that I’m doing now.

I’m hiring them.

Yes. There are many, many things that could go wrong in all of this, too. I’m choosing not to look. Some people (details people) might call this stupidity. I call it vision. Or faith. I’m holding arty-farty metaphorical hands with the blokes in the bible who, when God told them to go check out the promised land, came back and said “Yeah, let’s go for it!” not the ones who came back in fear and complained about how hard it was going to be.

How about you? Are you the details type? Do you think I’m slightly mad for attempting all this stuff? Have you ever found yourself in the middle of something and thought “What the hell did I say yes to THIS for?”

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Oh, and on a completely different note (so different that I can’t even think of a segue), the wonderful Andrea Kelly has nominated me for the Addictive Blog award. Thank you!!! The equally wonderful Pat Bailey nominated me for the same thing a few weeks ago, but I was too all-over-the-place to know what to do with it. Thank you!!!! Thank you all for reading my outpourings week after week, and thank you for liking, and for commenting, and for saying Hi. It means so much, I have LOVED meeting my readers, you make it all worth it. Thank you ALL! (Oh my…this is sounding like an acceptance speech…) THANK YOU!!!

I know there are rules with accepting these things, like nominating a bunch of others.. I’ll get to that…soon. Promise!

Thank you, and Good Morning.

Good heavens!

I get up in the morning and find an extra 80 people suddenly following my blog. Wow. Thank you! I love meeting new people.

I will try my hardest to be as deep, wise, witty and intelligent as you probably expect (LOL!!). I will absolutely let you down in that, so I will now apologise in advance. There’s something about trying to live up to your own expectations that’s always going to end badly, so I’ll make it easy for all of us and…not.

I’m working on a “proper” post, but right now I just wanted to say Hi, and thank you for brightening my day.

Oh, and next time you drop by can you please bring some coffee? I think we’re out…

 

Uh. Oh.

I learned a hard lesson yesterday. And, to make matters weirder, I learned it right here.

Yes, you learn things about yourself when blogging. And, unfortunately, you learn them in publc. Actually, I think learning things in public is my destiny. And no, I’m not particularly happy about that, but I’ve tried the other way and it doesn’t seem to work.

Here’s what I learned:

Just coz you can write pretty doesn’t mean that you make sense.

Sometimes you still need to WAIT before you send.

Or talk.

Or make big decisions based on what you think is true..

 

But do you know the even better bit of that lesson?

There’s forgiveness. And grace. And mercy. And favour. And love. And we can move on and forgive ourselves and not think that we’re the stupidest people that ever set foot on the planet, and we’re not sixteen any more, so instead of our friends thinking “Ewww, how on earth did she manage to do something so STUPID?” they’re thinking “Oh man. I do that too.”

And…here’s another lesson that I’m learning right here, right now, today, on my own blog:

That is WHY some of us are destined to learn and fail and grow and make mistakes in public. It helps all the people who want so much to stay private to know that they’re not alone. And that, my friend, is what it’s all about.

Blogging is harder than it looks people

Here’s one thing I know:

I don’t want to blog.

 

It’s true! I don’t want to put my feelings out there for everybody on the internet to see. I do that often enough on Facebook – and at least there I can veil them and put a humorous spin on them. This is like, you know…real. Out there.

And if I DO blog, like I am now…I don’t want to share it with people. Because that’s just…you know…weird.

I should share this, I guess.

Really, I should.

I guess.

 

It’s good practice…for the future…when I’ve actually got something interesting to say.

All I’ve got to say today is this:

Blogging is harder than it looks.